First lemme get this straight. i fucking love zombies. they're fucking rotting fucking human corpses that have come the fuck back to life to feast on everyones fucking brains. how the fuck cant you like it?
well for a long time, no one really liked zombies. it was a fringe community you know? every so often a zombie movie would come out and only the zombie kids would go out and be like ZOMG ZOMBIES. everyone else would be like fuck that movie, zombies dont scare me and my huge cock. fuck zombies. and then we'd go and watch our zombie movies and enjoy the shit out of it.
then we'd have fun talking about how we'd do in a zombie appocalypse. we'd keep track (im seriously here) of where we can get supplies, how fast, different escape routes, possible scenerios, defensive positions, how to view the media at the time, possible allied resistance vs small pack survival in the north. all sorts of stuff. its was badass cause we all knew how lame zombies were at actually killing people. aside from you just kinda standing there and letting a zombie bite you, they're pretty easy to get away from. and thats why all the normal kids didnt like zombies, they didnt see the fun of them. they didnt see how poetic the idea of the zombie was. think about it you assholes, slow, inevitable death. and then you have the romero films making social commentary on the side. and bam you got a genre that can achieve cult status and no more, just the way i like it. lets me keep my lame interests...well...lame:)
and then came the zombie video games....and slowly, frat boys all over the world, started being big on zombies. now most would say, well now more people like the same stuff you do!
NO!!!! THAT ISNT WHAT HAPPENED!!!!
what happened was all these people CLAIMED to like zombies, but really they just liked shooting them on their frat-house xbox 360!!!! they've never seen these fucking movies! im sorry but bitches, you cant like zombies unless you've seen a few zombie movies. oohh but ive seen resident evil and 28 weeks later. WEEKS LATER? ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME? AAAHHHHHHHH FUCK!!!! and because of these shit-gobbling ass-hats all the zombie movies comming out now, lack the charm of most other zombie movies. hats off to shaun of the dead though (ahem, lmao). dont get me wrong though, i am gunna watch these shitty zombie movies cause in essence, all zombie movies are kinda shitty.
the point is, fuck you douche bags. you took my cult-hobby and turned it into a fucking fraternity joke much like the guy with the smallest wang. i know you frats know this cause come on, what else is the point in all that "hazing". more like "lets see if these people will do anything we want so we can fuck them later while they're drunk". faggots. no offence to actual homosexuals since im sure you dont wanna be accociated with these people either. im sure you like real zombies just like me :)
in closing. FUCK YOU.
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