On Ellen the Generous

Will she continue this great work? will she carry the torch? wtf are you talking about mindcreature?

asshole im talking about minority delivered, confession based tv shows of course! oprah, to my knowledge has started this confession culture here north america. i dont know how far thats penetrated but it for sure was a staple on her show. through episodes of oprahs talk show, shes had condemned people from various walks of life, backrounds and associations appear on her show to tell their sides of their stories. we got pedophiles balling wishing they didnt feel how they felt, too sick to be helped by regular society and too scared to end it all. we saw homosexuals and their stories of being thrown out by their families. we saw the plight of addicts who, by other peoples standards just dont have self control, but when really it goes much deeper than that.

so will ellen continue this? i think so. i originally decided to post this post cause i was being homophobic and being all like oh so now the black lady is gone we got a gay lady? but then i was like well duh, it takes someone who's been victimized to communicate and connect with people in similar situations. however unlike oprah , i dont see ellen as being alarmist in the same sense. and thats where she will do one better. and here is where i lay my goal out. i wanted to be interviwed by oprah and finally tell me story, well i guess its ellen now.

On Bruno

o you realise that this movie is rated 18A? HOW THE HELL!? This movie had 120 seconds an airbrushed wang dancing around on screen like a fucking marionette. The scene culminates with it pointing at you with its pee hole right at eye level so you can see the darkness that is the urethra. jesus cake-baskets. this should be an R rated movie.

this is the thing, i saw it once, so i dont know if i laughed at stuff in the movie cause it was funny, or cause it was shocking and envelope pushing. really it went back and forth between shock humour and clever, well delivered jokes. many scenes in the movie were well done and very funny. other times it was just like he sat down and thought "hhhmm, how can i push the envelope? i already fought a dude naked when i was a dumb arab...whats next?? I know! 2 minutes of screen time ONLY for my junk!!! hahahahahaha im a genius".

SPEAKING OF WHICH! so you know, this movie IS Borat take-away the kazakh and plussing the gay-archtype.

All in all, it can be considered a funny movie despite the fact that it routinely forgets that its a comedy movie and thinks its a less morbid, more genital oriented version of jackass the tv series. just be warned, you probably like fishsticks if you think this movie was amazing.

Also, i hear fags really hate on this movie cause it makes them look...faggoty. shut the fuck up, i dont hear russians bitching about james bond movies or arabs bitching about every movie post 9/11. at least in this movie you queerbates are portrayed as human beings with real emotions. ever watch Munich? you do realise that the arabs might as well have been werewolf-nazis with ak's and hot-garbage breath. cause no one likes bad breath. who gives a shit if someone is spreading a stereotype about you. wtf do you care, you fuck butts. what could possibly offend you in regards to your being a fag. you already violate bum. and if this movie really does offend you, then it must mean that you fit the stereotype of a flaming homosexual. for all the fags out there who arent offended by this movie, good on you, now you're a real minority (minority the way the indians, jews, blacks are) that accepts that there are stereotypes and thhey can be funny.

for the rest of you queer-ass-sons-of-bitches who were offended. eat my shit. peace out slaves.

On Pokemon

dude, i just watched some pokemon

it was completely gay ike totally fucking gay our parents were prollly like what the fuck are they watching? that stuff is gay . lolz, seriously man, the charmander, he just willingly accepts being imprisoned in a fucking pokeball, and is happy about it, like wtf? why the fuck cant he walk around like pikachu? or why doesnt he just go off and chill at some chill spot somewhere? and at the end of the episode it said something totally faggish and assinine er somthing. it was like
maybe getting lost isnt so bad at all! especially when you're lost with your friends. of course, finding your way home with your friends is even better!!!



like why the fuck did they need the last line? do they need to spell out that a good time includes finding your way back? what like we're just never gunna get back home er some shit? like we're lost forever? what, are we dead er something? like wtf. lol but seriously man, whats the deal with that last line? they really spell it out for kids. maybe thats why we know that we need go home when we're lost.....that show is a part of culture and humans are culture based creatures, like we need it to survive because we have no instincts and are useless at birth and stay that way for a long time.anyway, like future robots er somthing, enslaved humans, and they wanna extend their reach into the past, thus making the future better for themselves. so they go back in time and engineer stuff for us to see, to generate culture so we can survive, yes these robots are japanese. oh wait, better idea.



INTELLIGENT



this idea is that future humans started getting lost and never comming back for some stupid reason. investigations showed that they'd meet up with their buddies, and get lost and never come back. sometimes leaving a note with some stupid reason on it. anyway, they were like how can we fix this. usually the lead scientist would get an idea, start to develop it and then midway through, call up his buddies and get lost with them, and never come back. and so this is how it went for years, and years, 7 full centuries infact.. where they finally had the idea to time travel. so they started to train time astronauts. the only ones who could time travel were the japanese and asianz of the time. this is because they had the lowest rates of getting lost and never comming baack. (alright, you see, *ahem*. the reason why asians dont usually get lost and never come back is because their driving ability, made it harder to get lost and never come back in a car. they usually cause an accident. OMG thats so racist lol. anyway keep reading my story). So eventually a crew of Japanese. Chinese, and one Indian person. Came back to 1975, and decided to start making anime and other brainwashing stuff and economic manipulations to create the ideal future. With china and India at the forefront of the world in 2900 er something along with japan as the worlds BIGGEST baseball league with so much money and pull within both govs that they are like another nation, a pseudo league that’s sort of nation no one knows what; as soon as you know what, you die in a tragic baseball aaccident. Of course these nations do have a noble purpose too, they don’t just want to have world domination (and in Japan’s case, they wanna be the only baseball league in the world, and still be a country sort of), they also want to rid stop the world from getting lost and never coming back. And thus concludes why I think pokemon was created.




See? This is why drugs are bad.

On Fucking Awesome One Liners XVI

We are what we repeatedly do. Excellence then, is not an act, but a habit.

On Fucking Rainbows

LMAO. so icp is really fuckin gay. like who thinks dressing up like clowns and rapping poorly is badass? i guess juggalos but jugalos are like the scum that falls to the bottom in a pool of scum. real scummy stuff. anyway so im reading this cracked article about them and their new song miracles and how retarded it is. so i put the track on and read and listened, and then hear the dude bust out this line

fuckin rainbows! after it rains!

and this line

fuckin magnets!! how do they work?

lmao. fuckin rainbows man!!!! we're so high right now we up in the golden gate bridge-o-heaven!!!! oohhhh shit. wtf is the golden gate bridge doing in heaven? how shit is detroit if you think that? that bridge sucks ass. it has wires 'n shit. fuck that bridge. you know what bridge is awesome? london bridge. cause some dude bought that shit and it was shipped to him in pieces cause he didnt check to see that the famous bridge in london is called tower bridge. london bridge pwned a sentient being. wtf has the golden gate bridge ever done? opening credits of full house? fuck the olsen twins and that hip junckle joey (uncle + junkie = junckle) . bob sagat? more like bob FAGGET. yeah i went there.

yeah now that im done making fun of my own bad sense of humour, look at this fucking picture.

What the shit?

and its not like this isnt the only absurd thing in the video. in fact its the least absurd thing ive seen out of the two frames ive copied and pasted in the time i paused the video and rewound it to hear the fuckin rainbows line again. lmao fuckin rainbows!!! rainbows are awesome, im not saying they arent. like ffs its the visible spectrum, visible in the sky after a storm! the juxtaposition! the science! nature telling us shit! its wicked! but come on, you cant rap about fuckin rainbows unless you're eminem. and we all know that shaggy sucks it better. but in all seriousness, this isnt he weirdest thing ive seen in this video.

2010 Mordor Vaycay ;)

look at this picture. wtf is going on here? is he trying to be a pyramid? why the fuck is the sky on fire? heres a final image for you. this entire thing, was most likely shot on a green screen. let that whole thing sink in for a while.

yeah. totally fucked.

On Fucking Awesome One Liners XV

if gay got me off work, i would have been packing fudge years ago

On This Seatbelt Ad

First off, wear your damn seat belt.

In closing, wear your damn seat belt.